Oh, Billy, I thought your father
would have a fit.
HELEN. I thought he had an awful cold, he was coughing terribly.
MRS. CROSBY. Coughing? He nearly choked to keep from laughing. I told
him I'd send him from the table if he laughed at you.
WILLIAM. Why you never spoke to him once.
MRS. CROSBY. Child, explain to him that wives don't have to--Oh, I
forget you haven't learned that yet. You know, Billy, I can talk to your
father very effectively without words.
(_Crosses to below table_ R.)
HELEN (_turning to_ MRS. CROSBY). Mrs. Crosby--
WILLIAM. Mother, Nell's all fussed up because we've got money. She
thinks you'll think--I'm--what in novels they call marrying beneath me.
(_He and_ MRS. CROSBY _laugh_. HELEN _looks a little hurt_.)
HELEN. Well, he is.
MRS. CROSBY. Nonsense, child, don't be silly. (_Sits down stage end of
table_.)
HELEN (_moving a step to_ MRS. CROSBY). It's not silly, Mrs. Crosby.
Everyone will say it, and they'll be right.
WILLIAM. Let's settle this thing now once and for all, then. In the
first place it's all nonsense, and in the second it isn't true--
HELEN. Oh, yes, it is.
MRS. CROSBY. Oh, the first row! I'll settle this one. Nelly!
WILLIAM. Now then, Nell, out with it, get it all out of your system.
HELEN. In the first place, it's the money.
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