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Smith, Francis Hopkinson, 1838-1915

"The Under Dog"

The
Admiral is coming, and some brother officers who would be pleased to
know you.'
"Well, I was struck all of a heap for a minute, knowing what kind of
clo'es I had to go in, and so I says:
"'Well, gentlemen, that's very nice of you, and I see you mean it, and
if I had anything fittin' to wear there's nothin' I would like better;
but ye see how I'm fixed,' and I lifted my arms so he could see a few
holes that he might a-missed before, and I motioned to some other parts
of my get-up that needed repairs.
"'That don't make no difference, Cap'n, what kind of clo'es you come in.
We dine at eight o'clock.'
"Of course I knew I couldn't go, and I didn't want 'em to think I
intended to go when I didn't, so I says, rather positive-like:
"'Very much obliged, gentlemen, but I guess I'll have to get you to
count me out this time.' I knowed I warn't fittin' to sit at anybody's
table, especially if that old Admiral was comin'.
"The Colonel see I was in earnest, and he stepped up, quick-like, and
laid his hand on my shoulder.


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