Lyin prostrate at the foot uv the throne, doin the offis
uv a footstool, wuz Charles Sumner, wunst Senator, wich wuz typikle uv
the complete triumph we hed won over our enemies; while doin other
menial offices about the halls, wuz Wade, Wilson, Fessenden, Sherman,
and others who hed opposed the change from a Republic to a Kingdom. They
wuz clothed in a approprit costoom, knee breeches and sich, and
presented a pekoolyerly imposin appearance.
Carriages containing the nobility began to arrive, and ez they entered,
the Grand High Lord Chamberlin uv the Palis, the Markis von Randall,
announct em. "Dook de Davis!" was ejackelatid, and Jeffson entered.
"Earl von Toombs," "Sir Joseph E. Johnston," "Markis de Bouregard,"
"Count de Pollard," and so forth.
Noticin that the titles I hed heerd wuz mostly tacked to Southern men, I
asked Giddy Welles, who wuz standin by, why it wuz thus, and he sed that
Northners wuzn't reely fit for it. We wuz, he said, a low, grovlin race,
and coodent adapt ourselves to the habits uv nobility. The South wuz
shivelrus, and cood do it. They wuz given to tournaments and sich--they
hed got accustomed to cirkus clothes, and cood wear a sword without its
gettin awkwardly between the legs. Northern men, sich ez were faithful,
wuz allowed to barsk in the smiles uv royalty, but it wuz in sich
positions ez sooted their capacity.
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