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Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville), 1881-1975

"Mike and Psmith"

.. Smith, I do not for a moment wish to pain you, but have you ...
er, do you remember ever having had, as a child, let us say, any ...
er ... severe illness? Any ... er ... _mental_ illness?"
"No, sir."
"There is no--forgive me if I am touching on a sad subject--there is
no ... none of your near relatives have ever suffered in the way I ...
er ... have described?"
"There isn't a lunatic on the list, sir," said Psmith cheerfully.
"Of course, Smith, of course," said the headmaster hurriedly, "I did not
mean to suggest--quite so, quite so. ... You think, then, that you
confessed to an act which you had not committed purely from some sudden
impulse which you cannot explain?"
"Strictly between ourselves, sir ..."
Privately, the headmaster found Psmith's man-to-man attitude somewhat
disconcerting, but he said nothing.
"Well, Smith?"
"I should not like it to go any further, sir."
"I will certainly respect any confidence ..."
"I don't want anybody to know, sir. This is strictly between ourselves."
"I think you are sometimes apt to forget, Smith, the proper relations
existing between boy and--Well, never mind that for the present. We can
return to it later.


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