A big, dumpy brier, with a shorter stem and a celluloid end, is
responsible for general descriptive work, sporting news, etc., while
a trim little meerschaum with a carved bowl engenders excellent
criticisms of music and drama. Occasionally, too, this bright
fellow, who does considerable work on the editorial page, gets into
a newspaper controversy. Then he pulls from his pocket a short
'bull-dog' with a horn tip, whose massive, square-jawed bowl and
ferocious short-curved stem breathe forth aggressiveness, and, jamming
it full of 'plug cut,' he writes one of those satirical, sledge-hammer
roasts which make him feared by his opponents.
"One night he was detailed to write up a show at one of the leading
theatres. The play was 'East Lynne,' which, as a tear-producer, ranks
away up and was presented by a first-class company. When the critic
reached home he was feeling pretty sad, so he looked around for his
meerschaum. His wife had been cleaning house that day and he couldn't
find any pipe but the long one. What was the result? Why, he wrote
such a humorous description of the play that everybody thought 'East
Lynne' was a farce comedy and, when the performance closed on the
following night, two-thirds of the audience wanted their money back.
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