You see, I wanted to believe. It was difficult
enough to accept that this was finally happening to me - that my
first novel was about to be published in hardback to building
fanfare. To think otherwise, that something might stop the novel
from being published, wasn't a "happy thought," and anything but
happy thoughts, my agent advised, would seep disagreeably into
the novel's successful launch. But unhappy did things turn when
Knightsbridge announced that it was closing shop.
But I was not to be put off. Armed with ten bound galleys, my
agent appealed to several hardback publishers...and when they
all said no - in almost every case for the same reasons Brian
Tart at Bantam gave us - we tried paperback publishers, lowering
our expectations and hoping then for a paperback original deal.
Twice we came close. First Ace, then Berkley, however editors at
both houses met resistance from editorial boards who felt that
the novel would find no audience.
Feeling dejected and down on my luck, I had to blame someone for
this conspiracy, so once again I contacted my agent and told her
I would be seeking representation elsewhere. This time she told
me she wouldn't take me back if I changed my mind, and who could
blame her. My next agent, who'd left an old and very successful
New York literary agency to start her own agency, was young and
fresh and building a name for herself as one to watch in the
business, with editors chasing her all over the floor at the
first American Booksellers Association conference she attended on
her own.
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