Upon another occasion I entered a barber's stall, and finding it
oppressively hot within, I commanded the attendant to carry a
reclining stool into the street and there shave my lower limbs and
anoint my head. As he hesitated to obey--doubtless on account of the
trivial labour involved--I repeated my words in a tone of fuller
authority, holding out the inducement of a just payment when he
complied, and assuring him that he would certainly be dragged before
the nearest mandarin and tortured if he held his joints stiffly. At
this he evidently understood his danger, for obsequiously protesting
that he was only a barber of very mean attainments, and that his
deformed utensils were quite inadequate for the case, he very
courteously directed me in inquire for a public chariot bound for a
quarter called Colney Hatch (the place of commerce, it is reasonable
to infer, of the higher class barbers), and, seating myself in it,
instruct the attendant to put me down at the large gates, where they
possessed every requisite appliance, and also would, if desirable,
shave my head also. Here the incident assumes a more doubtful guise,
for, notwithstanding the admitted politeness of the one who spoke,
each of those to whom I subsequently addressed myself on the subject,
presented to me a face quite devoid of encouragement. While none
actually pointed out the vehicle I sought, many passed on in a state
of inward contemplation without replying, and some--chiefly the
attendants of other chariots of a similar kind--replied in what I
deemed to be a spirit of elusive metaphor, as he who asserted that
such a conveyance must be sought for at a point known intimately as
the Aldgate Pump, whence it started daily at half-past the thirteenth
gong-stroke; and another, who maintained that I had no prospect of
reaching the desired spot until I secured the services of one of a
class of female attendants who wear flowing blue robes in order to
indicate that they are prepared to encounter and vanquish any
emergency in life.
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